People Skills
People skills a tool to help us effectively deal and interact with others. The first thing we have to look at is how well one connects with people. People skills include the ability to effectively click with all types of people and make the relationship with them favorable. This includes accepting that not all people are the same. They can be different than us and we from them and it is okay. We don’t all have to be the same to have a positive interaction with others.
A person with good people skills can read the non-verbal signs and symbols that another person transmits before they make actual verbal contact with that person. They will know how to make that interaction a favorable experience for both parties. If the person visually looks different than us and we can read their non-verbal signs such as their style of dress, their posture etc., we can begin to assess how we are going to approach them. With that visual picture in our mind already, we know what we can and can’t say that is appropriate for that person. That alone is half of the battle in understanding how to communicate with them effectively.
The next thing with using good people skills is how we talk to someone. We must be extremely clear when speaking to someone so there is no confusion with the message we are sending to the person listening. We must make sure that our non-verbal communication matches our words. It can be confusing to the listener if the non-verbal and verbal elements of our communication are not in sync. If I were to say, “Welcome” to someone without a smile and my arm folded across my chest, the message is really you are not welcome here. The listener would feel less than welcome because of my non-verbal communication.
The first thing you want to do is make eye contact with a person. As they say eyes are the windows to the soul. It shows you are not frightened of the person and that you are honest. Dishonest people tend to avoid eye contact. Interact with the person on a regular basis if possible to build up a rapport with the person. The more at ease you both will feel.
Use good language and grammar when speaking to people. You can’t assume because someone dresses a certain way that they do not use proper language and grammar. Good people skills include respecting others, as you would want to be respected. Rule of thumb; speak to others, as you would want to be spoken to. It boosts the other person’s esteem as and makes them feel good about themselves too. This includes have a purposeful conversation. Don’t speak just for the sake of speaking. No one wants to hear dribble. Make sense when you speak so people will want to communicate with you. When they see you coming they will say to themselves this person knows what they are talking about. I look forward to hearing more from them. Be a team player don’t always feel you need to dominate the conversation. Let others speak as well.
One of the best people skills you can have is to be a problem solver. If you can help others solve their dilemmas; it is a very appealing quality that people will look to you for. Using tact and diplomacy is a given with problem solving. Also let the person put their own input into the solution process as well, this empowers them to feel like they can solve their own problems.
Finally like anything else people skills require practice to get them right. The main thing is if you are a sincere, kind and a decent person you already have the most important people skills one could embrace regardless of ones position in life. Treat people, as you want to be treated. If you can’t do that then your people skills need work. Remember in life we get back what we give out. If we treat people with the right people skills we will be treated that way back.
